The soldier sits on the ground, his back to the over-turned apple cart. A shiver runs down his spine as the events of the past replay over and over in his head. He is alone here inside this old embattlement where he has taken refuge. He fights the battle over and over again. Time and time again he tries to find the decision that he could have changed that would have made the battle’s outcome turn out differently. Again, he shivers.
The noises of war have long since stopped outside the walls, but in his mind, the clatter rings as though the swords and spears were right there in front of him. Startled, he turns as a small voice calls out “Anybody in there?” He moves to a defensive posture behind the cart, looking for the source of the sound. A small movement near the broken gate catches his eye. “Who goes there!?” he shouts. “Be ye friend or foe?” He had managed to patch up the gate and erect defenses in the places where they were once torn down. Defenses, which in the back of his mind, he knows he no longer needs.
The voice calls out “You can come out now. There is no need to fear.” “A ploy, yes, this is but another ploy by the enemy to call me out and strike me down.” He thinks to himself. One hand, then another appears at the top of the wall. He has no weapons to defend himself other than his own wit. In recent days, he’s begun to question whether even that will avail him when the need arises. A young woman struggles to pull herself over his defenses. He watches. She seems harmless enough. “No! This is a trick of the enemy!” his mind cautions.
She brushes herself off and straightens her clothing as she descends the stairway from the parapet. She holds out her hands in a gesture of peace and kindness. He backs away stumbling over barrels and crates he has gathered to hide behind. “Come, the war is over. We have friends outside. Join us.” Her voice is soothing. His fears begin to ebb and fade. Indecision overtakes fear. What should he do? Will he be trapped into a battle he no longer wishes to fight?
He stands frozen. Not knowing whether to turn and run or to follow the women, seeking out the friends and joyous sounds he hears coming from outside the gate. This battle has raged so long and become such a part of him that he is torn between the fear of leaving the safety of his citadel and the thought of being trapped, isolated and alone for his remaining days.