Over the last several months, I’ve watched my dad’s knees fail him.  It started with one knee then the other to the point where he walked with a cane.  During the early onset of the knee issues, he wouldn’t get them fixed.  I assumed that it was because he didn’t want me to have to take care of both he and Mom, who at the time was battling agressive cancer. While that assumption was somewhat correct, it was also somewhat flawed.

I have learned a few things from watching Dad’s recovery as well as from comments he has made since having the surgery completed.  The challenge of having the knees fixed was not only physical.  It was also very much mental.  Some of the mental challenges are things you might think of;  not wanting to deal with the pain, being laid up for a few weeks, or depending on someone else to get by day to day.  There were other things though that I really hadn’t thought about. 

He mentioned the other day that his knees were ready to be fixed but he wasn’t ready.  He has said a couple of interesting things.  He wasn’t so much worried about the pain as he was that the artificial knee wouldn’t ‘feel’ like a normal knee.  It might feel foriegn.  He has been surprised, as have his nurses and therapists, at the lack of pain in the knee that was replaced.  He actually complains more about pain in the left knee which remains to be fixed.  He has been quick to point out to the nurses and doctors that he is ready to have the left one fixed as well.  The surgery was much more tolerable than he thought it would be as far as the knee pain goes.

Another thing I’ve noticed is that he is much more concerned now about his bad knee giving out.  I watched him many times in the past few months practically crawl up the stairs.  He had come up with ways to get his laundry up and down to the basement without my help.  Now though, He is very cautious of the stairs.  Today, the therapist took him clear up and back down.  He seemed to do very well compared to when both knees were bad.  He told me at lunch that he wasn’t going to go up and down the steps yet without someone around.  He looks physically capable, especially when compared to when both knees were bad.  Mentally, though, today was a challenge he had to conquer.  Next will probably be getting him in and out of the shower.  Stepping up over the side of the tub will be a new trick.

The mental challenges seem to far outweigh the actual physical challenges.  He didn’t really want to go to the Transitional Care Center for another week in the hospital.  When he got there, he was glad he was there. They helped him figure out how to do little things we would normally take for granted.  It also meant someone was there around the clock.  He did get sick while he was in the hospital.  It was a relief to me to have the nurses there to help.  In the end, he commented how much better he felt having that extra time to get his strength back in his knee.  He says at first it felt like it had a lead weight put in it.

Even getting out of chairs or off the toilet has required more mental effort than most would think.  I raised his recliner so he could get out of it fairly easily.  The hospital gave him a toilet extender to help with the height of the seat there.  The kitchen chairs are a bit of a challenge.  He has to mentally prepare himself to get up.  I don’t think its because it hurts as much as it is that he doesn’t have the strength built up in his leg to help lift his body.  He has a bad shoulder as well, so he sometimes sits at the table for a few minutes contemplating which way to get up.  He figures it out, but then again, he’s been having to figure out how to do things with bad legs for the last couple years.

I’m glad that he is ready to have the other knee done as soon as the docs say he is ready.  Watching him walk in the hall today without use of his cane or walker was hopefully a small glimpse of where he will be come Fall when both knees are done.  He will be on his walker probably until he gets the second knee done.  He should have been on one long before now but he got around as well as he could with his cane.  I know he now looks forward to the day when he can walk out to the swing in the yard or walk around the neighborhood again.  That was something he really enjoyed.  The birds will be happy too.  Their feeders will be full again.  He has his mind set on getting the other knee done.  He will push himself through it.  He will find a way to overcome the physical as well as the mental obstructions. 

He was concerned about me using my vacation time to take care of him (another mental challenge).  I told him not to worry abou that.  He needed to get his legs fixed.  That was much more important than me going on vacation somewhere.  Fortunately, my job allows me to work from home so I really haven’t used that much time.  I look forward the day he walks on two good knees. 

Thanks to all the friends, neighbors and relatives that have been very supportive throughout the first round.  Your support is greatly appreciated.

~Cappy